I am taking a step on the MarutFans blog where no other has yet ventured.The best way to relate to this Kahani, I am presuming that you were born in 1948 or earlier. It may also be familiar territory to those born later.
The parents of this generation had lived through the British Occupation and survived WW2.These folks, as we still remember them, were ever loving and the pearls/gems of this earth. Life was indeed wonderful under their tutelage.
The father was the provider of the household and the mother was the ever loving stay at home MOM who cared for the children like an ANGEL.
The DAD decided all the paths of the children and there was no argument.They both were unanimous in good education and marriage for their kids as early as possible.The daughter was under “ EXTRA PROTECTIVE CUSTODY ‘ till she left the house on her wedding day.
The parents loved each other and yet due to tradition or protocol never showed their emotions in public. You never saw yours parents in public ever:
WALK WITH THEIR ARMS AROUND EACH OTHER’S WAISTS.
HUG EACH OTHER.
On a rare occasion “ONCE IN TEN YEARS “ your DAD would pat your MOM on the top of her head like you and me would do so to “BONZO” our pet BOXER DOG.
The DAD made all the arrangements for the alliance/marriage and you came in close contact with the bride or the groom on your wedding day at the Pandal/Church/The holy place.This was the first time you both met.
On the morning of the wedding the DAD took his SON aside and patted him on the back and said: “WELL DONE BOY, DO WELL”
The MOM on the on the morning of the wedding day of the DAUGHTER hugged her for a long time and told her:
“During your life and especially on this your wedding night your husband will become a”BEAST “. Bear with this side of him and you will soon get used to it.
With such sound advice and knowledge the Bride and Groom were unleashed in to the Marriage Jungle.
The educational institutions ( Schools/Colleges/Universities.)did not have SEX EDUCATION on their curriculum.
The groom heard some vague stories whispered by his best buddies of how the BIRDS and THE BEES and also the humans did what had to be done.But they assure him that by practice he will be KING.
The bride on the other hand is told by her “SAHELIS” That one day you will be “VISITED BY THE STORK “
Thus THE BLIND LEADING THE BLIND they enter THE MOST IMPORTANT AND UNIQUE PHASE OF THEIR LIVES.
Dear readers it is permitted to pause and drift down memory lane at this juncture.
Was I Innocent/Clueless/Plain Dumb.
One of the four gentlemen has a MASTERS and a PhD and yet he has not collected his DOCTORATE.
The TIGERS are in AMBALA for the GUN FIGHT AT THE SIDHWAN KHAS CORRAL and on a saturday night at the AMBALA CLUB they bump in to an old friend. He is six feet six and weighs 280 pounds and built like a LINE BACKER. He is a gentle giant. He is really tough. He is AJAX “SANDS” SANDHU.
One night on exiting the Club close to midnight he has Derek Daley at the back of his 350 CC Bullet bike and forgets to see the small roundel at the cross roads in front of the M H.The bike comes to a sudden stop and both go flying over with Derek riding him like a “ MONKEY ON HIS BACK . They make contact with terra firma/dust themselves and drive away.
He took the brunt of the landing.
He had recently got married and says to us, you guys do not know nothing yet. I thought I was a tough guy who fought a war and never knew fear.I had an arranged marriage like the others and I met my beautiful bride on the day of the wedding.
The next five evenings I am at “VISHRAM/ARAAAAAAAAMSE “. Just when I thought I had crossed over to the other side I came up on the sixth day like the PHOENIX to Salami Shasth.
Praise the GURU.
It gave me a scare,but life is wonderful.
That in a “ NUT SHELL “ is the “POWER “ of an arranged marriage
HASIMARA BLACK PANTHERS
This officer was a fighter pilot who just about made the height requirement of a fighter pilot.
He was of south indian descent and was a CARD CARRYING/CROSS BELT WEARING PURE BRAHMIN. When he came of age there was a ceremony he attended where his head was clean shaven and he was ordained with a cross belt. This was a thread in a loop which was worn across the shoulders like a cross belt/Sam Browne.
When ever he took a leak he would lift the cross belt and drape it around his left ear. Your guess is as good as mine for the reason.
They arrive in Hasimara and the whole squadron is at the railway station to greet them.They are paraded in style to the officer’s Mess and a grand party is held. The party winds up at day break and as the newly weds are being sent off. Chick Paralkar is second last in line and he wishes the lady good bye and calls her Chimp.
Sam and Keru commence slapping Chick at the back of his head and ask what kind of a goof ball is he? Chick says I heard the name as Chimp. Sam and Keru give him the correct pronunciation of the south indian name and inform him that there is no “P” at the end.
Chick says sorry to the guys and goes into giggles about his FAUX PAUS. His laughter is infectious.
PROF CHOUDHARY was a Tea Planter/Owner/Manager of an Opus Magnum of tea estates. He was an honorary Black Panther.There was no married housing in Hasimara as it was a FORWARD AREA.
PROF owned four small bungalows nestled in the tea gardens and he gave them to the squadron for the married officers to use gratis.
This officer and his bride moved into one of the bungalows.
These bungalows were two abreast facing each other.The other three bungalows were occupied by Black Panther married officers.
On working days the usual ritual of the four officers’ wives was to sit out on the luscious lawns and have a joint breakfast around 0900 hours.
Prior to his marriage this officer was a serious faced pilot.After marriage he had a beatific smile on his face every day.You could not make it go away.He was in perpetual married bliss.
One week later the unit goes to JORHAT for Air to Ground range work. The smile is gone from the face.
Six days later a hunter has to be replaced from home base.The ferry roster has Keru as the pilot next in line.He like a true gentleman gives up his trip to this newly wed officer.The officer takes one Hunter back to base at 1500 hours and he is asked to bring the replacement early next morning.
The officer lands in Hasimara and is home by 1700 hours and his wife is positively surprised at his homecoming.
We close the evening and leave the folks to do what ever they do behind closed doors. Early next morning the Pilot leaves his residence at 0500 hours. Starts up the ferry back Hunter and is down at JORHAT by 0800 hours. On landing the beatific smile is back on his face.
Back in Hasimara the newly wed lady arises and is making the bed when she sees a small white object nestled in the sheets. There are no phone services in the bungalows to call Jorhat or Madras. She goes into a cold sweat and Panic Stations set in.
Soon she hears the other three ladies call her for breakfast.She reluctantly drags herself across the road to the lawn opposite.The three ladies immediately recognize that the young bride has a problem.The other three tell her that put together the three of them have a total of 20 years of married bliss and so nothing will shock them.
The new bride slowly tells her story.
Last evening as soon as her husband came home “ HE BECAME A BEAST “. She quickly put a magic potion to “ GUARD AGAINST THE BEAST “ in her mouth. She further says that between 1800 hours in the evening to 0400 hours this morning her husband became “ A BEAST FOUR TIMES “.
This morning while making the bed she found the “ MAGIC POTION “ ( BIRTH CONTROL PILL ) nestled among the bed sheets.
Sweating profusely and hands trembling she asks “ THE TEN MILLION DOLLOR QUESTION “
“DOES THIS MEAN I WILL HAVE QUADRUPLETS ?”
The three ladies throw their bone china tea cups high in the air and
START LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY
THIS IS ACCOMPANIED BY RUNNING ON THE SPOT THIS IS FOLLOWED BY RUNNING AROUND THE LAWN.
THEY COLLAPSE ON THE LAWN.
THEY START HOOTING. T
HEY STAND UP AND HOLD ON TO EACH OTHER FROM COLLAPSING.
THEY SCREAM FOUR TIMES FOUR.
THEY FALL ON THEIR FACES AND START POUNDING THE LAWN.
THIS CARRIES ON FOR 15 MINUTES.
THEY ARE EXHAUSTED.
The lady with the maximum number of years of marriage gets back her breath and slowly utters these prophetic words.
“ YOUNG LADY YOU HAVE A GOLD MINE. YOU WILL BE HAPPY ALL THE DAYS OF YOUR LIFE. LET YOUR HUSBAND BE A BEAST AS OFTEN AS HE WANTS TO. NO YOU WILL NOT HAVE A FOUR PIECE QUARTET.”
THE LADIES COMMENCE THEIR UNCONTROLLABLE LAUGHTER.