THIS CANNOT BE TRUE OF YOU
This kahani was in the days when pilots flew six days a week and saturday afternoons were Days of Beer and the odd Op Immediate Signal.
The Marut squadrons had well qualified pilots from the QFI/PAI and Iraq returned A2 instructors pool.
Saturday afternoon 1400 hours.
Western Air Command and Air Headquarters were closed for the week end.
A non-descript N C (E) walks in to base ops and hands over a sealed envelope and gets a signature in an official looking book for the envelope. The N C (E) vanishes immediately and is never seen again. The base ops officer who is a helicopter pilot opens the envelope and finds two copies of one Op Immediate Signal. The signal has names and service numbers of 14 pilots to proceed to Air Hq and further to The United Kingdom for conversion on a twin jet fighter. One pilot in this gang of hot rod pilots is a Marut pilot. The base ops officer is very excited and he sends one of his Lascars post-haste on a bicycle to deliver one copy of the signal to the chosen Marut Pilot. He is the only pilot with no extra qualifications to his name. On the other hand he has PATHI (Influence)we are told.
The chosen Marut Pilot is elated and his better half asks him to phone Air Hq to confirm the signal. The telephone exchange informs him that the lines are down. He calls the Sergeant of the telephone exchange and he is told that the lines are indeed down and he will try to route him through the Army connection ASAP.
There is loud yelling and the BARBARIANS are at the gates shouting and congratulating the CHOSEN PILOT and demanding beer and liquor. Soon copious amounts of beer are consumed and also two bottles of scotch whisky. The line is still down to Air Hq and within two hours justice has been done to a good amount of alcohol. Soon all the well wishers leave and miraculously the lines to Air Hq come alive and connections are made to various Air Officers. By 2000 Hours it is confirmed that the Op Immediate signal does not exist.
You have to excuse the slowness of communications as Mobile phones did not exist. A trace is commenced to track down the prankster and no leads are available. A formal complaint is lodged with the Boss and a Pilot from another squadron is blamed and is asked to pay for the liquor consumed. The other pilot was in Salawas with friends hunting and so no proof exists and the inquiry is dropped.
Rumor has it that the telephone exchange received a case of RUM from an anonymous donor.
The wife on seeing the Op Immediate signal said
“ THIS CANNOT BE TRUE OF YOU “
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